Omitted Pilot Scene
An original introduction to Bette and Tina that never made the cut [Season 1, Episode 1 (Pilot), January 18, 2004].
INT. CALIFORNIA ART CENTER – MAIN GALLERY – AFTERNOON
Alive with industry – gallery workers installing a show, works of art stacked against wallsand throughout the sleek, white-vaulted main chamber of the museum. There’s music,chatter, hubbub. A gallery assistant, JAMES, sets down a crate marked “FRAGILE”, jogs out of the main gallery.
INT. CAC – EXECUTIVE SUITE/BETTE’S OFFICE
James hurries through the executive suite to a door marked “Director’s Office.” He knocks once, hustles inside.
JAMES: “Bette, are the Giacomettis going in the main…….?”
BETTE PORTER is splayed against the Charles Eames desk, TINA KENNARD pressed between her legs -they’re making out like a couple of horny teenagers. (Note 1) James sees them, freezes in his tracks.
JAMES: “Oh….! Sorry Bette….. Tina –“
James goes bright red, backs out of the office. Bette stops kissing Tina, catches her breath. They burst out laughing.
As Bette kisses Tina again, a LINE appears on screen, starting on Bette and taking us into..
MAIN TITLES – THE CHART
A superhighway of connectivity, at the end of which the LINE reemerges and takes us out and—
GALLERY WORKER #1 (FEMALE)
(re the basket) : “What’s in there, Tina”?
TINA: “I went to La Brea Bakery – I knew Bette would skip dinner. She always does when you guys are hanging a show.”
GALLERY WORKER #2 (MALE): “My wife’s never once brought me food when I’m working late.”
BETTE: (teasing) Maybe you’re not as good to her as I am to Tina.
Tina rolls her eyes. (Note 2) Bette puts her arm around her, gives her an unself-conscious, casual kiss.
GALLERY WORKER #1: “I think my husband still expects me to cook for him when I get home. But then, he kind of has the tougher job. You two are lucky you don’t have to deal with the whole kid thing.”
Tina and Bette exchange looks, but decide not to comment.
TINA: “I should go. I’m meeting Alice at the Nuart.”
BETTE: (starts leading Tina out) “What are you seeing?”
TINA: “Faster Pussycat Kill! Kill!”
(off Bette’s look) “It’s for one of her ‘best of’ pieces”
BETTE: “The hundred best films about murderous go-go dancers?”
TINA: “Something like that, actually.” (about to go, remembers) “Hey, don’t forget we have that appointment tomorrow. (calls back to James)
TINA: “James, will you mark it on her calendar? 11 AM tomorrow. Put “Important.”
Bette pretends it’s a hassle, but it’s all good-natured. She gives Tina a kiss goodbye.
BETTE: “Love you.”
Some of Bette’s coworkers smile, appreciating as always the deep affection these two have for one another.
